Gaining Intimacy

My last post was about what intimacy is and the difficulties achieving intimacy with God.  This post will focus on how we overcome those difficulties and grow closer to God.  We defined intimacy as honesty or the ability for two people to be genuine with one another.  Psalm 139 describes how well God knows us (whether we choose to reveal ourselves to him or not).  The first verse says, "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me."  We can choose to reveal ourselves to God by praying out the contents of our heart.  Sharing our frustrations with Him.  We can express our joys to God through prayer or worship.  We can give our worries to God.  He does not need us to share these things (a benefit of being omniscient) but He desires this from us.  By using our free will to reveal ourselves to God we are choosing him (an expression of our love).
 However, intimacy is a two way street.  We also need to allow God to reveal Himself to us.  Obviously we do not know God as well as He knows us.  The first chapter of the gospel of John tells us that when God came to earth (in the form of Christ) the people of earth did not recognize Him!  The bride did not recognize the bridegroom!  The image by whom we were made stood among us and we did not know it.  According to Hebrews 1:1 God has spoken (and I believe continues to speak) in many ways.  To gain intimacy with God we need to listen when he speaks.  I was taught (thanks Dr. Brooks) to remember BENJI:

Bible
Events (miracles)
Nature (Romans 1:10)
Jesus
Intuition (dreams, conscience, meditative thoughts)

We can become more intimate in our relationship with God by reading the Bible, contemplating God's invovlement in everyday events, observing and respecting nature, studying the life and teachings of Jesus, and by meditating (allowing our mind to focus) on God.  I am sure there are other ways to know God.  Would love to hear other thoughts on the topic.

Greater intimacy

I have a different definition of intimacy than most of the world around me seems to have.  My synonym for intimacy would be honesty.  When people are truly intimate it means they hide nothing from each other.  This may be in the form of physical intimacy meaning a couple does not have shame with each other.  It could be emotional intimacy meaning a couple expresses their feelings openly.  Cognitive intimacy would be the honest expression of thoughts and opinions.  In the course of dating people move from a low level of intimacy (or honesty) to higher levels.  On a first date words are guarded carefully, conversation tends to be shallow, and feelings are not generally expressed openly.  In an attempt to make a good first impression a person might be just a little bit, well, fake.  As time goes by guards are let down and opinions are expressed more freely.  Feelings might be revealed more openly.  Etc.  In other words you let the real you show... you become more honest.  I am setting the stage for this question, "How honest is your relationship with God?"  Or, put differently, "How initmate is your relationship with God?"  Here are a few questions to spur thinking:

Do you ever feel like you can't talk to God because of guilty feelings or for other reasons?
Are you ever ashamed of who God made you to be (including physical appearance)?
Are you emotionally expressive in your prayers to God?
Do you give God access to every part of your life?

Personally there are times when I feel like I can't talk to God.  I don't always like what the mirror has to show me (is that another hair sprouting from my ear?).  My prayers can easliy be quite bland and repetitive with no emotion.  There are parts of my life that I do not always want God involved in (can't I just unload on that person who is frustrating me and bypass that golden rule stuff?).  When I do these things I am robbing myself of intimacy with God. 

My wandering heart

This is a continuation of the last post on cheating.  The song I quoted in that post is Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing.  I greatly enjoy Chris Rice's version of this hymn.  There is a line in this hymn that says, "prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love."  Continuing the song says, "Here's my heart O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above."  These words by 18th century pastor Robert Robinson haunt me.  Robinson is admitting, "I am a cheater."  He has a wandering heart.  I do too.  It starts with my wandering eyes that seek out the enticing things of the world (Luke 11:34).  It continues with my actions as I spend my time with the things of the world (James 4:4).  Finally, without realizing it... I give my heart away (Luke 10:27).  There are so many things that come before God in my life.  My heart is prone to wander, prone to leave the God I love.  There is another line in this hymn that says, "let thy goodness like a fetter bind my wandering heart to thee."  A fetter is a chain or shakle similar to modern day handcuffs (see picture).  The hymnist is saying- God handcuff my heart with your goodness.  Let your goodness keep me so tied to you that my cheating heart won't seek other things.  Words are easy.  We can say we love God, that we are committed to the Lord.  Doing is tough.  You have to allow your wandering heart to be shackled to God.  Read about His goodness.  Meditate on his goodness.  Think about how He has been good to you.

Cheating

Words are easy.  I speak countless words a day (as many of you know and bemoan).  My vocal cords can create words with barely a thought or a whim.  Only a fool would deny that words are powerful.  How do you react to words like "murder" "hate" "brotherhood" or "swear?"  What happens when a promise is made or an insult is uttered?  Consider the words, "forsaking all others."  Wedding vows that are so easily spoken but mean a lifetime of effort.  According to my family therapy text book there are "...approximately 1 million divorces occurring annually in this country (Goldenberg & Goldenberg, 2008 p.42).  That means 1 million people this year will break a vow made before God.  Speaking of God- words spoken or sung to Him come easily too don't they?  Do we truly mean the words of worship we speak or sing?  Are there songs we sing and don't even know what we are saying i.e. here I raise my Ebenezer here by thy great help I've come????.  What does Scrooge have to do with God's help?  (This line comes from one of my very favorite hymns- ask me if you have questions... better yet look up the answer and post it in a response).  I say all of this simply to introduce the idea of cheating on God.  More will come in future posts. 

Goldenberg, H. & Goldenberg, I. (2008) Family Therapy: An Overview. Belmont, CA:  Brooks/Cole.

Securing a win

Well, tonight my beloved Ravens had a heartbreaking loss to the Pittsburgh Steelers.  Interestingly enough about half way through the game I got a call congratulating me on my team's excellent performance (and rightlly so).  However, in the second half the tides turned and the Steelers won the game.  As Yogi would remind us, "it ain't over until it's over."  I mention all this to highlight a point.  For centuries there has been this debate about how sure a person's salvation is (sometimes called "once saved always saved").  I have seen church members argue whether or not a person can lose their salvation.  There has even been some division over the issue.  The way I see it is that we can't make the call so early in the game.  By trying to determine the outcome (salvation) now we are trying to take control out of God's hands and put it into our own.  We want to determine the outcome and not let the game play out.  I am not saying this to make a point for one side of the argument or another... I am simply saying the argument is foolish.  This is a case of trying to be God instead of letting God be Himself.  In our Reconciled series we mentioned needing to love God for who He is... not who we want Him to be.  Let's accept his soverignty with more dignity and stop trying to be in control.